It’s about 7 o’clock in the evening on Thursday, February the 8th and in a few hours I will be removing the hair from my scrotum. I wouldn’t normally be doing this — I’m not particularly fond of the bald look down there. I’m having some work done on my plumbing, so to speak, and those parts must be as hairless as possible.

Yep, tomorrow morning I’m scheduled to be sterilized. By choice, of course. My wife and I have discussed the issue thoroughly and are resolutely decided that children are not in our future. Vasectomies being much cheaper, safer, and less uncomfortable than female sterilization I thought it only proper that I volunteer my nuts to the cause.

We’ve bought all the essentials: sweatpants, briefs, and frozen peas. We’ve both got the day off work tomorrow. For good measure, I went ahead and took Monday off as well. I’m just about settled in for a long weekend of tender, swollen balls.

Oh, that, and a hairless nutsack.